Being a first time mother, I was both excited and nervous about this entire motherhood journey. I wanted to be prepared for this beautiful chapter in my life before my baby arrived. So I tried to gather whatever information I could on parenting. But it is only after becoming a mother, I realised that motherhood is an experience that is unique to every individual. No matter how many journals, articles or books you read, there is nothing that can prepare you completely for this roller-coaster ride.   

Practical life always differs from what’s written in the books. However, sharing one’s experience always helps. So here’s a list of things I wish I had known before having a baby - 

• Breastfeeding hurts at first –

Breastfeeding hurts so bad initially that it might even make you cry and scream at the same time. Sore nipples, engorgement, latching issues and the excruciating pain make distressing for both mother and the newborn. Breastfeeding is a natural process but it takes a lot of practise and tears to get through it. However, it gets better with time. The pain and all the other problems resolve in a few days, usually within a week.

• The extra weight isn’t going to melt overnight – 

Don’t be surprised if you see yourself in the mirror and still look pregnant. It’s going to take time and patience to lose the weight that you gained over the course of nine months. Trust me, you will still need your maternity pants post delivery. It’s normal to hold onto some extra weight after pregnancy. It will melt off eventually.

• Don’t hesitate in asking for help – 

Consider yourself lucky if you are surrounded by people who readily offer help.  Accept any sort of support, whether it is from your friends or family or any other person. There is no shame in asking for help as a new mom. In addition to the sleepless nights and hormonal fluctuations, your body is still recovering from the birthing process. It is not possible to do it all alone. When someone offers to look after the baby, don’t hesitate to accept it. Take a break and get some rest or a warm shower or anything that relaxes you. You really need it.   

• There is no magic trick with babies –

There is only one rule that there is no rule that works on babies. You may feel that you have found the perfect feeding position or a way to make your baby fall asleep. But it won’t be long until it stops working. A trick might work one day and stop working the next day. Be grateful if it lasts a week at most. Everyday is a new challenge and you have to come up with new ideas every time to soothe your baby.   

• Having a newborn will impact your relationship with your partner –

It doesn’t matter if you and your partner have a rock-solid relationship or you fight over petty issues. This new member is definitely going to put some weight on your relationship. Once the baby arrives, it is not possible to have that pre-baby relationship with your partner both physically and emotionally (at least for a while). Having a baby is a life changing event. It is something new for both of you. Remember that communication is the key. Express your feelings to your partner and also listen to theirs. Give each other time and space to get adapt to this new change. 

• This is just a phase –

Although catering to the needs of a newborn may seem super exhausting but remember that this too shall pass. This is just a temporary phase that will be over before you know it. The struggle is real but at the end of the day, everything is worth that cute little smile on your baby’s face.

 The list isn’t exhaustive. There are things that are hard to describe and can only be learnt through experience. In the meantime, I would like to know what are the things you wish you had known before having a baby. Please drop your views in the comments section.

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Komal is a freelance content writer and a full-time mom. She has years of experience in writing on various topics such as finance, travel, education, etc. She is now trying her hand in sharing her experience as a mother because there is nothing as great as combining two joys – Motherhood and Writing.

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Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in this post are the personal views of the author. They do not necessarily reflect the views of The Mom Store.