10 Easy Ways To Bond With Your Newborn Baby
Photo by Hollie Santos on Unsplash
A child who has a deep bond with his parents, turns out to be an emotionally healthy adult who can handle life's ups and down with resilience and positivity. To ensure this, it is important to start connecting with your newborn the moment you take him/her in your arms. When you are a new parent, with the feelings of Happiness & Excitement, there are also bouts of self doubt and anxiety concerning whether you will be able to Bond with your new born baby. With millions of people giving you advice on everything you can imagine about the baby, it becomes confusing & nerve-wracking for some when it comes to bonding with a newborn baby. Whether you are a new Mom or Dad, the tips below will be helpful for both of you. These are tried & tested tips which have worked very well for me and I am sure these will make your bonding with your newborn an easy and fun time:
- Touch & Cuddle - A baby needs to feel safe, secure & understood in order for the bond to deepen. A baby feels safe & secure when there is skin to skin touch with him. When you touch & cuddle baby, lot of feel-good hormones like oxytocin & serotonin are released in both baby & you, which leads to emotional connection with the baby. Baby feels secure & starts recognising your touch & smell. In fact, newborn babies can differentiate your touch & smell with that of others. Hence the more you touch & cuddle, the more your feelings will also grow strongly for your child & the child will also feel emotionally & physically connected to you! You can massage and bathe the baby to increase the touch time between you.
- Look in their Eyes - As I said before, a baby needs to feel seen, heard and understood. When you look in the eye of the baby while playing, cuddling or talking, it reassures them that they matter. They are an important aspect in your Life. This is fundamental in developing a healthy bond with the baby. The baby will start developing a sense of trust in you which is essential to develop and deepen your body with the baby.
- Respond to their cries - Many people give advice, that when the baby cries let them cry for a while as it will make them a strong individual. But I disagree with this. When a child cries if he is in distress due to hunger, needs a diaper change or any other issue, it is wise to respond to their need immediately. When you do that, it generates a secure feeling in the baby that his needs are being met. This may look like a small thing now but if you do not respond to a child's cry immediately, over time, it can create a sense of abandonment in the child which will show up when they grow into an adult. They might have self worth issues as they grow up and might seek fulfillment in all the wrong places to deal with this. There are countless studies that substantiate this.
- Talk to them - Many find talking to a child silly. They feel that a child is not going to understand. But the fact is that the more you talk to a child, the faster he or she will start understanding things. You can talk about the routine things you are doing. Don't worry if you feel it is a not a child like talk. Just talking to them about anything makes them have a feeling of belongingness.
- Hold them often - Holding the baby in your arms not only invokes the much required touch that is mentioned in the first point but also helps nurture the baby emotionally. They feel safe & Loved. Love is the most important feeling that can create an Healthy bond with your baby.
- Play with them - Baby do get bored with the routine. Playing not only breaks the monotony and brings fun in their life but also helps create trust with you. They know that you are someone who cares for them and brings laughter in their life. More than the expensive toys, the child values the time & attention given to them during their play time! Also the added benefit is the release of all the happy hormones during the playtime which will further deepen both of your bond.
- Sing lullaby - Singing lullaby to sleep is one of the easy way to form a bond with a newborn. Your voice soothes the child to sleep. After an active day, singing in your voice (it doesn't matter whether you are a good singer or not), relaxes the baby into deep sleep. This comfort shared between you two can make your connection deep and satisfying.
- Encourage them - In the first year itself, a child goes through major transformations physically, achieving many milestones like sitting, standing with support, standing without support, walking with & without support. Before achieving this, they try numerous times to reach their milestones in which they fail many times and get hurt. It is important to cheer them on every effort they put. Babies get motivated & they don't stop trying. Your cheerleading can strengthen your bond. But a caution here, do not force your child to achieve milestones early. This can hamper their confidence level which can disrupt your bond.
- Make use of feeding time - Feeding time can be utilized as a time to connect. Brush their hair with your hand while they are feeding, it relaxes and soothes them immediately. Sing lullaby or tell a story softly. Massage their legs gently. All this will instantly relax your baby and they will find feeding time to be a comforting time which can create a secure bond between the two of you.
- Take care of yourself - Lastly & very importantly, take care of yourself. Sleep when the baby is sleeping. Eat well. Nourish yourself with nutrient rich food. Don't worry about household chores. They will never finish. The more you are well slept and well fed, the more happy and relaxed you will be which will translate into a deep and healthy emotional bond with your kid. If you will be irritated, tired and grumpy, it will definitely disrupt your connection with the baby. Also don't strive to be a perfect Mom. Just be a Happy & Loving Mom. That is all a child needs!
A child is hungry for Love and the more you Love your child unconditionally, the deeper and pure your bond would be! Which is your favorite point among the ones mentioned above. Comment below and share your experience with your newborn!