Planning For A Second One?
Photo by Travis Grossen on Unsplash
So, is it unplanned, or have you actually planned for more responsibility? Having a second child is a big decision. Parents have to look at so many things beforehand. You have to be very sure before planning the next baby, so that you don’t make your baby or family condition suffer.
If it is unplanned then also reconsider your situation and think whether you really need the second one. In neutral families, two kids are considered important also so that one can accompany another, and the first does not feel lonely.
Let’s consider some points that need to be taken care while planning for the next life:
- First thing is obviously finances. Plan only if you are financially stable enough to face the expenses of both kids. As we all know today education, our lifestyle, making kids settle down and finally getting them married is a huge expense. Education doesn’t mean only school, college fees it also includes tuitions, extra-curricular activities, books, other many expenses. Later, if child wants to go abroad then it is a bigger expense. You also might want to have property share for both.
- Secondly, physical health of mom. If you are fit enough and have stamina to handle two kids with doing all the household chores you are ready to give birth to the companion and best friend of your elder one.
- Next comes family support. There is a huge difference in handling one and two kids at a time. Your whole life will change. You will have much more sleepless nights and work gets ten times. So just make sure that you have a good support and help with you. Either be sure to have full-time maid in neutral families or your in-laws and husband must be supportive enough to help in household chores and taking care of baby. Avoid taking the whole responsibility on yourself; to prevent going mad!
- Check the behaviour and acceptance of elder one. Some kids needs parental care very much as they are pampered. Some are talented enough that they need to brush-up that talent for their career. Some are lonely kids and needs company all the time. So that depends on age and behaviour of child. As your time and attention will get divided and elder one will feel ignored and not being love after younger one arrived. So just make sure that after child you and your partner make sure that one of the parents would always take care of elder one if other is busy with new arrival.
- Working mothers/fathers may have to leave their jobs for sometime as leaving two kids completely with house help may be unsafe. The care and love you gave them will never be available from anyone whether its grandparents or maid or anyone in family.
Just make sure that if you are bringing the life in this world, it’s your whole responsibility to make sure that they are taken care of well. Don’t spoil the child life by leaving them just with others (at least for first 3years).
So, plan accordingly, as supermoms can handle any situation!
Ankita Modi, an MBA in finance, previously a banker, is now homemaker and mother of two little boys of ages 3 years and 8 months.
Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in this post are the personal views of the author. They do not necessarily reflect the views of The Mom Store