Photo by Dakota Corbin on Unsplash
Motherhood is a big word, with a different definition for different mothers. But what I understood being a new mother of 6 month old baby girl is “Motherhood is a never-ending responsibility”. I am an entrepreneur and dentist by profession, and I was used to having a busy schedule, along with family and home responsibilities (which is never ending work for women). Being a career-oriented person, I wanted to settle down in my profession first and then take up this responsibility; i.e. when we both were completely prepared for this new responsibility of parenthood. Luckily, both sides of our parents supported us in this decision. All thanks to them that they didn’t get pressurized by society rules (so called rules, marry at 25, have child at 27 and so on). I became a mom at the age of 33 after 4 year of our marriage, and I think that’s okay.
Earlier, it was very difficult for me to manage all my responsibilities during pregnancy. My life was too busy before pregnancy, being an entrepreneur. In dentistry also, one patient takes almost 30-40 minutes and afterwards we need to keep all data, work history, lab work etc. In this scenario, I was always late for my lunch sometime it was 4pm and had to bear with baby kicks, she must be hungry till that time. Best part is, sometime my Mother-in-law sent me tiffin, Isn’t it wonderful? I drove a car till my 8 month of pregnancy. After 8 months my husband used to drop me for few days in a month but he was also having his emergency patients. Later on I figure it out by prioritising my work schedule because working women are superwomen they can manage everything.
By God’s grace, everything was normal in pregnancy so I could manage work home balance in pregnancy also. I worked till my last day of pregnancy. I had gone to my gynaecologist after treating my last patient. That was my last day of 9 months. She did my check up and told everything is normal but baby sac is not opening so she did scratching at baby sac. My mom was there to help me in those last days of my pregnancy. After dinner labour pain started, but gynaecologist told us to be admitted only if you have any fluid discharge or bleeding so waiting for that right time. That night was horrible for me, was waiting for the morning by counting each and every second with labour pain. Early morning I got hospitalise. Doctor checked me and told me to wait for few hours because my mom and doctor were waiting for normal delivery. But it was C-section as those few hours were like decades for me to wait with pain and happiness of upcoming baby.
Yeah, most awaited time came when doctor told me that you are blessed with baby girl and I was like wow, God listened to my prayers. Later on I heard outside scenario of operation theatre. My in-laws were dancing with happiness as my husband is an only child to them and they were eagerly waiting for girl since 30 years may be. When doctor bring her to me, oh my god can’t explain that feeling of being mother 1st time in words. Happiness was in the air, I wish to hold those moments forever. That was a C-section, so I was little drowsy and sleepy still remember every moment of that time.
The real picture started after 2-3 days of delivery, which is called as a Post-delivery depression. Yes, even the strongest women you know may be going through depression. Many factors affect you - pain, sleepless nights, the little human who just wants to be in your lap, the breastfeeding task. Emotional roller coaster is when you can’t hold your baby because of those entire needles pierced in your hand. The pain starts when you are an independent woman who likes to roam freely but after delivery you are glued to that one room. Not to go out, wear sweater, tie a scarf, no spicy food, no chaat nothing, don’t eat this and that. I was wondering how my grandma gave birth to 6 children and still happy ever. My mom is quit experienced in baby holding and all still I was not ready to give my baby to her, was possessive, so stupid I was!
I am glad these months have now passed. The most important thing I realized is your partner and your family's support is important. You need them for everything. Right from helping you heal from physical pain, to helping you understand yourself, your little human. Elders literately help you with all their knowledge and experiences. You get scared, worried, angry, irritated, happy, and sad every emotion is at peak. But the journey is all worth it with the smile of my little angel. Wait! You will heal. And then you look back at those days all you remember is happy moments with your little one and smile.
I started working when my angel was 2 months old, everyone was against it. Maybe they were right; but for me, those 2 months were punishment being workaholic. It’s not easy to take responsibility of newly born baby and work. My frank opinion is, do not hesitate to ask for help, any superwomen can’t handle it without support. I am blessed to have supporting in-laws and parents just because of them I started working again. Apart from all I am thankful to my angel, she gave me this priceless feeling of motherhood. We think happiness of life is in partying, achieving milestones in career, money, materialistic things but real happiness of life is in Family and backbone of the family is a mother. So the actual never-ending responsible journey of motherhood starts from here. My mom always tells me that newly born baby is a pot of clay; it’s our responsibility to make a beautiful masterpiece from it. Motherhood is simple when you know what is good for you and your family. Isn’t it??
Dr. Rohini is an entrepreneur and Dentist (MDS) by profession. She runs her own clinic in Pimple Saudagar, Pune, Proprietor of Galaxy Clinic Dental and Orthopaedic Centre and works as a consultant Periodontist & Implantologist to many private hospitals and clinics.
Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in this post are the personal views of the author. They do not necessarily reflect the views of The Mom Store