Importance of Self-Work for All Mothers

Traditionally, we all have grown up seeing our mothers working day and night tirelessly. They always keep their family, children, ahead of themselves. They did it because they loved it, and no one forced them to do it. We are so grateful to have such mothers. Isn't it?

But time changed, the perspective of parenting also changed. Modern-day mothers are no way less in taking care of family, work, and children. But they also understood that self-care is as important as any other work. Parenting is not an easy task. Working on your own is not a selfish activity.

Like physical health, mental health needs attention too. Mothers are moms and a whole individual who has her perspective, idea and parenting style. To keep that cycle going, self-work is vital. Many mothers will think self-care is self-work, but no both are not the same. 

Self-work is more of self-growth as a human being. You may have a past life where certain things happened to you or decisions you took that turned out to be mistaken. You deny that life, or you are not asking that maybe you would have been different if you did not take that decision. You are just looking at them objectively from a mature adult viewpoint. But at the same time, you are saying that the past will not ruin your present or future. 

So how do you self-work on yourself, moms? Hold a pen and become the author of your own story. Writing helps you ease the baggage of pain, discomfort, or suffering and gives you a new lens through which you look into things from new angles. Suppose you are struggling to write your own story and do not know where to start from. I will help you with a list and it can be your guide to look into things from a new perspective.

Review the Story : Be honest as much as you can. Do not sugarcoat things or incidents of your life. Write things that originally happened to you. And, even the consequences like "now I have become like this", "I try to find positive things in the worst scenario cases".

Acknowledge Gratitude : Whatever situation happened to you, express gratitude to your present time. Also, mention your desire to improve yourself. It is the best sign of strength, and you are heading towards a positive change where you learn a new life skill.

Whom Do You Blame? : "I cannot trust anyone because my friends, my past relationship broke my trust" or "I have anger issues because of my parents". Do you want to blame them all through your life? Or you want to take ownership of your actions. The day you leave the blame game, the day you move ahead in life. 

What If You Stuck in Past Actions? : Picture yourself in the future and find answers to questions like how will your relationship be with kids? Or do you still have the burden of regrets? Now think about whether you want to live with that kind of person in future or not. It is a very good exercise for you and even turns out to be a life-changer. 

Write Down Your Present : After that deep analysis of past life and actions, it's time for you to write a story where you want to see yourself capable, victorious, strong, confident. Churn out the old life and take a step ahead to a confident human being. Your kids will look into your present and not past life. So why bother them with the unnecessary burden of your past to ruin their present and future. 

Bring a new story to reality : Change your thought process, and your feelings will change automatically. Your new story needs reality, and it's now. Do not confine it with your age or liability; rather, embrace and welcome them. 

Conclusion : The above six steps sound simple, easy but they are not. It is hard work, but your sheer determination on self-work helps your physical and mental health. It brings so much light into your life that you can get a new meaning of existence. 

Dipannita is a stay-at-home freelancer and Youtuber mom. She believes in gender equality and finds perfection in imperfection. You can connect with her on Youtube, Facebook, and Instagram.