Co-sleeping Or Independent Sleeping With kids.
New moms please know this and believe it when I say ‘Your kid loves you no matter how you choose to raise them’. Co-sleeping or Independent sleeping will not change...
New moms please know this and believe it when I say ‘Your kid loves you no matter how you choose to raise them’. Co-sleeping or Independent sleeping will not change...
I suppose this is that one option that every new parent tries to figure out. But I will tell you a secret, it is OK to choose either.
Google will list the pros and cons for each method. Here’s my experience. Being a mother of two, I got the opportunity to try both co-sleeping as well as independent sleeping.
When my first baby was born, the paediatrician came to our room once I had recovered from labour enough to stay awake. He talked at length about how to care for our newest member in the family. Finally, he warned us against co-sleeping with my baby at all cost. He advised to let my baby sleep in a baby-cot in a separate room and to allow my baby to cry out a bit before picking him up.
The doctor’s reasons were sound
Later that night, at the hospital, my baby decided to keep the entire ward awake. No matter how we swaddled our barely few hours old boy, or how much I fed him, he just refused to settle in the hospital crib. Finally, the on call paediatrician was called and she simply asked me to lay my baby next to me and let him sleep with me. She asked to set an alarm for every 2 hours to mark the feed time and make sure that my son had a clean diaper at all times. She asked me to follow my instinct more than anything else.
Since that day my son, has not slept anywhere but near me all snuggled up. He never cried at night, he slept through the night and our bond is stronger than I ever hoped it would be.
Now, lets fast forward to the birth of my beautiful baby girl. She like her brother came to me through normal delivery. And just like her brother’s paediatrician, her doctor repeated the very same set of advices about baby care and sleep habits.
On the first night of her life, my baby girl slept in her crib only to come to me for feeds. Since, I was too exhausted from all the pain and blood loss, I didn’t complain. On the second night, she slept next to me just like her brother and that’s when the realisation dawned on me that I had become a mom again. This was the moment, I truly bonded with this tiny miracle and surprise. On the third day we returned home and as night fell our dilemma rose. Who would sleep with me, my new born or my two-year-old toddler who had been waiting for me since last three days? That night and for many more nights thereafter, I slept like a sandwich.
Needless to say, this sleeping arrangement was not working out for me. I used sleep straight sandwiched between both my kids. I woke up every 2-3 hours to feed my daughter and every time I woke up, my son tightened his grip on me. Finally, my husband set his foot down and forced me to start using the cot we had bought for our baby. For the next 7 or so days, my husband and my son slept in a separate bedroom while my daughter slept in her cot and I slept on our family bed alone and finally free.
Learnings!
So, what was my learning from this? Well, the answer is simple. Every child is different and it’s up to the parent to choose their course of action based on their circumstances. If I had to list them, it would be as
New moms please know this and believe it when I say ‘Your kid loves you no matter how you choose to raise them’.choose any sleep cycle or bedtime routine, Co-sleeping or Independent sleeping will not change the amount of love your kid feels when they look at you. Give them loads of cuddles, hug them during day and they will be just fine.
A few precautions to keep in mind
So go ahead and enjoy your motherhood the way you feel most comfortable and natural. This is your journey and only you and your partner can decide how to make the best of it.
In the long run, it won’t matter if you co-slept with your baby or not. The thing that matters the most is weather you were present for your child when they needed you. Trust me, there is no dearth of those moments. Be safe, be present and most of all, enjoy every moment of their childhood because time is a thief and before you realise, this moment will be a memory.
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Richa is a professional photographer at Fingly-Family Moments by Richarts Photography by day and a blogger by night. She is a doting mother to two beautiful children. She loves to travel, read and sometimes binge watch series on Netflix.
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Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in this post are the personal views of the author. They do not necessarily reflect the views of The Mom Store.
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