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7 Ways to Become Confident As A New Mom

No matter what, those first few months will be beautifully difficult; however, there are a few things that I've learned throughout my mothering  journey that could help you through the journey of gaining confidence in your role as a new mom... 

I would argue that there is nothing more difficult than the first few months of  being a first-time mom. It isn't like anything you've ever experienced before;  your body is flushed with hormones that seem to be working against you. 

No matter what, those first few months will be beautifully difficult; however,  there are a few things that I've learned throughout my mothering journey that  could help you through 

  1. Practice Following Your Instincts 

Yes, practice. Just because they are called instincts does not mean that they  are instinctual. Or perhaps they are, but we have just gotten really good at  burying them deep beneath loads of theories from parenting forums and  books. 

Practice listening to your baby's cues. Practice going with your gut. Don't force  yourself into a parenting style that makes you miserable. Listening to yourself  can be harder than you think... so keep practicing. 

  1. Ask Those Closest to You for Stories 

I know that I just said to follow your instincts. However, hearing other people's  perspectives can help you a lot. Encourage close family and friends to share  their stories of those first few months of motherhood with you without  necessarily giving you advice. 

It meant a lot to me when my aunt told me about a time when she visited my  mom after she had my brother. She told me that she watched us kids while  my mom napped. This simple story made me realize that my mom who I see  as superwoman got tired too. She had help and I deserve help too. 

  1. Do Not Open Yourself Up to Opinions 

When we are feeling unsure of ourselves, we tend to ask around for opinions  in hopes that it will make us feel better about our decisions. However, I think 

that this method usually backfires and ends up making us feel even more  insecure. 

If the well-meaning stranger at the park asks how your baby is sleeping, you  can lie and tell her that she is sleeping well even if she is up 20 times a night.  Because chances are the stranger will not be giving you life-altering advice...  

they will probably tell you some strategy that you have to use because it  worked for their child. Then you will walk away feeling like you are doing  things wrong and you may even feel obligated to try the stranger's method  and go against your own instincts. 

  1. Find a Few Good Mom Friends 

Mom friends are the best. Join a local mom's group, head to the park, go to  Target... they are everywhere. We are all looking for someone to connect with.  Find a few moms that you can really connect with and that have a similar  outlook on parenting as you do. 

As for the other moms? They can be great to chat with when you run into  them, but don't feel the need to go in-depth with every mom you meet. New  moms like to complain, give advice and judge. Leave the processing and real  conversation for your trusted mom friends and just give the other ones a  gracious smile and nod. 

  1. Remember Biology is a Huge Factor 

Keep in mind that perfect parenting does not necessarily result in a perfect  child. And how many fantastic people do we know who had horrible parents?  It works both ways, which means that we do not need to beat ourselves up so  much over ever tiny parenting decision. 

Part of who our children will become is already etched into their DNA. I, of  course, believe that parenting plays a huge role in shifting tendencies, but  there is something reassuring in understanding that it is not 100% in our  hands. 

  1. Try Your Best 

Everyone is just doing the best that they can at that particular moment -- including you. We have good parenting moments and bad ones... but the bad  ones often come when we can't muster up anything else.

A bad moment doesn't make you a bad parent. Try your best, try again, try to  change. As long as you are trying to get better, you are on the right path.  Change things that don't work for you & cling to the things that do. 

  1. Be Confident 

Work on being confident as a person, not just a mom. Motherhood consumes  us, and I think that that is part of what makes it so beautiful. But if you were  not confident in who you were before, motherhood will throw you for a loop. 

Find out your strengths, weaknesses, likes and dislikes as a person; then see  how they transition to motherhood. Discover what you enjoy about yourself,  and be sure to showcase that to the world.

 

Pooja Shah is a post graduate in economics and worked as a teacher in a reputed institution for almost 5 years. She is a mother of two kids, she is an avid reader and carries passion for writing.

 

Found this article useful? Read more blogs at www.themomstore.in 

Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in this post are the personal views of the author. They do not necessarily reflect the views of The Mom Store.


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