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10 things No one will tell you about pregnancy & Child birth

Photo by Jonathan Borba on Unsplash Being a first-time mom pregnancy and childbirth is kind of very new to me. I have shared some of the tips from my own...

Photo by Jonathan Borba on Unsplash

Being a first-time mom pregnancy and childbirth is kind of very new to me. I have shared some of the tips from my own pregnancy experience and I wish someone would have told me earlier.

1. Mood Swings:
From the very start of the pregnancy, boy-oh-boy the mood swings will be very high. There are several other elements contributing to mood swings, but the biggest culprit is a sudden surge in pesky pregnancy hormones. During the early days of gestation, a woman experiences a veritable flood of estrogen and progesterone. These two hormones can do a number on one's state of emotional health. Trust me! These mood swings are very normal in pregnancy. I remember crying the whole night when Jack Pearson died in the “This is US” series.

2. Nausea:
The Nausea and the morning sickness were the hardest part. My morning sickness was kind of tolerable. I had it only for the first three months. Some women have nausea during the entire pregnancy. Again, the hormones Estrogen and progesterone play a major toll on emotional feelings.

3. Disconnect:
Some women always feel disconnected from the baby during pregnancy and even after delivery as well. It’s all quite normal. Again it’s because of the pesky hormones. Everything will be settled sooner while seeing the baby. I remember people asking me to talk to the baby when he is in my tummy. I seriously don’t know what to talk to him.

4. Labor:
Labor differs from woman to woman. For some, it will be a matter of minutes. But for some people, it will be days. Trust me; the labor pain is very bearable. It will be so hard then you have imagined your entire life. But it’s bearable. So do not worry about the pain at any cost. 

5. Post-Partum:
The initial days after delivery will be really tough for the entire family. I mean those initial 30 to 40 days after the delivery are the hardest. I personally had a very hard time. The midnight screams feed, Waking every 1 hour at the night got me nightmares. But the end is just bliss when the baby crossed almost a month or two and started sleeping for a continuous 5 hours.

6. Sleep Pattern of the Baby:
The baby wakes every 1 hour and demands for feed. There is no specific sleep pattern during those days. Thanks to my in-laws, we used to look after the baby in shifts: 12- 3 AM will be our shift. After 3 AM my in-laws will take care of the baby This all will change over a period of time. My baby’s sleep pattern changed during 2nd month. He started sleeping for a continuous 5 hours during his 2.5 months. 

7. Breastfeeding
Well, this happens after the delivery. But in general, women do not worry about feeding during their pregnancy. Nevertheless, this is something that I missed learning during pregnancy. I used to Google even a small medical term, but this feeding concept is completely new to me. It’s so natural for breast milk to be secreted after the baby is born. But in the worst-case scenarios, if the milk supply is low or due to the poor latching of the baby, the new mom will not be able to feed the baby.

Also, If the baby needs to be in the NICU for a few days, then breast milk should be expressed and given to the baby. During the last trimester, it's essential for pregnant women to understand the concept of breastfeeding and latching techniques as well. But in the worst case, if the baby is not breastfed then look for other alternatives such as formula feed.

  • If you are going to feed your baby with formula, do some research and choose the best formula.
  • Also, get a manual/electric pump as well. This will help you, even if you are going to work after 6 months of the delivery. You can pump at any time and feed your baby when needed.
  • The electric pump is expensive than the manual one. If you planned for an exclusive BF, then pumping is not needed. If not, electric pump is the best. This can help you during the night feeds as well. But if you have a very low milk supply, get a manual pump and check if you can pump enough for the baby. If you can, then buy an electric pump. If not, you can go for formula.
  • Get to know about your lactation counselor as well. If there is any lactation problem, you can consult one. 

8. It's Okay to be a Guilty Mom:

There is no one called “Bad Mom”. Sometimes, due to the circumstances, we are not as perfect as imagined. That doesn’t mean you are bad. No Mom is perfect. There will be times when you are overwhelmed and discouraged and feel like you don’t love your baby anymore. But it’s okay. Things will change anytime soon.

9. Shopping:
Speaking of Baby shopping, I never knew a baby would need so much stuff. Due to lock down we were not able to visit the stores and shop for the baby. Thanks to The Mom Store, I have ordered almost everything online including neutral-colored clothes, some swaddles and blankets, casual wear and bathtub as well. After delivery, we have been concentrating only on the baby and not the shopping. This made my life easier.

10. Consultancy:
Today we have so many certified pregnancy instructors, and lactation counselors available online. Everything is just a click away. They conduct so many online classes and charge a bomb. But to be on the safer side, get in touch with your gynecologist for all the queries. Do not blindly depend on the instructors. They are certified professionals, but not doctors. A doctor who examines your body knows you well.

To all the mom-to-be: Well Done! You are doing a great job!
To all the non-moms (not sure if there is a word): Hang in there! You have great stuff coming up.

Happy Motherhood everyone!


About The Author: 

Asha Shylus is a Software Engineer by profession and writer by passion. Born in a middle-class family and being a 90's kid, life was exciting. As a millennial, just like any other normal person, she studied computer engineering and did MBA in correspondence. Being in the corporate realm for almost 10 years, she always wanted to do something more than computers. That's how she started to blog a few years back as writing is her stress buster.


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